Have You Heard Any Good Lawyer Jokes Lately?

It is real fun to crack lawyer jokes among your friends. Specially when you are in some parties or some functions, you find lawyer jokes more entertaining. Comedians have their minds full of lawyer jokes.

It is often said that if you can’t laugh at yourself, you need to lighten up. In the case of lawyer jokes, you might be surprised that many lawyers find them funny as well.

When it comes to jokes, many suggest the lawyer jokes that can really bring a smile in your face. This may or many not be the case, but lawyer jokes certainly highlight the shadier characters in their business.

Have you heard any good lawyer jokes lately? When searching “Lawyer Jokes” online, you will find nearly millions of lawyer jokes on the web. How about these jokes:

A lawyer named Strange died, and his friend asked the tombstone maker to inscribe on his tombstone, “Here lies Strange, an honest man, and a lawyer.”
The inscriber insisted that such an inscription would be confusing, for passers by would tend to think that three men were buried under the stone. However he suggested an alternative. He would inscribe, “Here lies a man who was both honest and a lawyer.”
That way, whenever anyone walked by the tombstone and read it, they would be certain to remark, “That’s Strange.”

A lawyer is sitting at the desk in his new office. He hears someone coming to the door. To impress his first potential client, he picks up the phone as the door opens and says, “I demand one million and not a penny less.” As he hangs up, the man now standing in his office says, “I’m here to hook up your phone.”

A man who had been caught embezzling millions went to a lawyer. His lawyer told him, “Don’t worry. You’ll never go to jail with all that money? In fact, when the man was sent to prison, he didn’t have a penny.

Home-Based Business – The Four Bodies

In the grand tradition of Abbott and Costello’s “Who’s On First” there is a business joke that seems to turn in on itself and leaves you wondering if you’re able to follow what’s being said.

“This is the story of four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done and Everybody was asked to do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that, because it was Everybody’s job. Everybody thought Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn’t do it. Consequently, it wound up that Nobody told Anybody, so Everybody blamed Somebody.”

I didn’t write the story above and I’ve heard it performed in other ways, but the main point to the somewhat humorous story is that when there are multiple employees it is possible there will be a significant amount of passing the buck.

In a home-based business this scenario cannot play out as easily. Why? Because it is likely that one person performs multiple roles in the small company. That person must own up to mistakes because there is no fall guy waiting to take the blame.

Customers won’t care about Everybody, Somebody, Anybody or Nobody. All they really care about is whether the person in charge is going to take care of things.

I have a friend who purchased a piece of exercise equipment. He lives in a remote area and accepted the extended service contract because it was pointed out that the service is in-home and anywhere within his home country. Within 24 hours of professional setup the machine was malfunctioning.

In the case of my friend he waited for over two months to gain service. In each case the telephone representative passed the buck. In the end, my friend demanded to visit with a supervisor and promised that a complaint would be filed with the Better Business Bureau if there weren’t a plan of action within 10 days. It wasn’t long before Someone stepped up to the plate and made plans to have the equipment repaired.

While this reflects poorly on the manufacturer it should also serve as a cautionary tale for home-based businesses to do what you promise to do. Assume the responsibility required to place the customer first and take care of problems as they arise.

Remember Anybody could do it, Somebody should do it, Everybody thinks it should be dome, but in the end Nobody is the only one to show up – and he can’t do a thing.

That just leaves – you.

Humor in the Place of Business

Humor is powerful. It relaxes people and lessens the stress of the everyday rush. Good humor in workplace spiced with a joke or two generates competence and originality, and managers who bring cheer and high spirits to the workplace find the people working with them to be encouraged and willing to chip in to the growth of the company.

Good humor not only in the hands of the managers but also through all aspects of a business can be priceless in serving a company’s objectives. Whether on a trade-show floor or inside a boardroom, a well-placed tasteful joke can be integrated into the presentation. The trick is to determine the limits of any joke exactly. Main principle in making a joke or offering good humor is to conform to the image of the company or corporation. If the company has a strictly solemn image, a far-out joke will cause raised brows and unpleasant comments.

To be successful, the joke needs to be funny and easily understandable. Taking too long to tell a joke will make the listeners lose their attention. One-or-two-sentence jokes are the better understood and remembered ones. On top of it all, humor needs to be politically correct without any racial, ethnic, sexual, or gender-based insinuations.

Making jokes at the expense of fellow workers is also taboo, while a self-depreciating joke can make a person more lovable by others. Using humor about situations but not people is a safe bet.

The language used is important, too. Curses and four-letter words may bring on instant shock and reaction but may mar the company’s image.

Oft-repeated jokes tend to bore the employees and the customers alike. While a good laugh relaxes people, used-up, tasteless jokes can create more tension.

Humor directed to the customers has to reinforce the company’s message, keeping the target audience in mind. Jokes that work with one kind of audience may not work with another, but repetition of a funny motto and mascots like the Pillsbury doughboy make the message indelible.

Jokes are not the only means for good humor. Around areas where people relax, such as the lounge, cafeteria, or the water cooler, placing humor magazines, a funny poster with a cartoon or a written sophisticated joke will improve the employee morale. Once in a while, an amusing memo from a superior or jokes sprinkled inside the company newsletter will perk up relationships.

Humor works better if handed from top down. Even in the most serious of businesses, if supervisors and managers initiate a humor break for a minute or two in each meeting, they’ll find that the ideas will generate faster, employees will be motivated for better production, and there will be more amicable give and take between people.

Within the most successful business undertakings, humor encourages attendance and production. Unfortunately, not each mission in business is always successful, and failure sometimes brings bitter lessons. Yet, looking on the lighter side of things and reducing the weight on the shoulders of the employees can boost up the next step.

Humor and a cheerful workplace charge the atmosphere with energy, friendliness, and warmth, and open the way to achieving business goals, because success and laughter always walk together.